Film Franchise Fridays: FRIDAY THE 13TH: A NEW BEGINNING

By Darin Skaggs

In its fifth run the Friday the 13th series go ahead and try something new. They also don’t reveal they are trying something new until the very end. This one is bad, very bad. This is surely the worst one so far, even after my rant about Part III. So Jason in this one is dead, he does not come back to life here. Instead a crazy medic whose son is killed decides to get revenge by pretending to be Jason. He never reveals this plan, it is just assumed due to contents in his wallet. The kills in this are way more boring than the others and the story is ridiculous.

The Horror Film Cliché

  • The movie ends with a twist, like all the other ones. This one is pretty confusing, Tommy is not the killer at the end, but now he is, but he is also hallucinating. I don’t know what is going on here, but there is a twisty ending so there.

The Not So Cliché

  • Tommy is back and he is now going to an institution. It is hinted that he might be the Jason impersonator, but not really. It is not cliché that there is an impersonator even if that story line is not interesting.
  • Joey is a large, annoying and insecure kid. He is killed by Victor with an axe, just some guy with extreme anger problems. It is just some random normal murder.
  • The little black kid Reggie who is spitting out stereotypical Blaxploitation like phrases survives until the end.

Rank The Deaths

17. Pete’s car breaks down. It works again, he gets his throat slit.

16. George is Reggie’s father so this death is sad and like a few others we don’t get to see him be killed.

15. Raymond is watching a couple of the kids have sex. He is knifed.

14. Jake, Robin and Violet are all killed with in like three minutes of each other and they are all pretty boring so here is a three way tie.

13. Duke is the other paramedic that laughs when he sees that Joey was killed, this upsets the faux Jason and he gets his throat slit off screen.

12. Lana gets an axe to the stomach. Real shame after getting all prepared for a night out with Billy.

11. Anita is Demon’s boyfriend. She is messing with Demon’s portal potty then stops. It turns out she is dead.

10. Billy is waiting to get lucky with waitress Lana, while waiting he gets hit in the bald spot by an axe.

9. Dr. Matt is found with a spike in his head, so we don’t even get to see his death.

8. Ethel is the most annoying character in all of these films. So when a cleaver comes from out of nowhere and hits her in the face, we are happy.

7. Joey is annoying. So institutionalized Victor takes his axe and chops him. Why did the institution give him an axe in the first place?

6. Demon is in the portal potty and then gets a spear through the chest.

5. Vinnie is just a guy stuck on the road with his buddy Pete. He gets a firecracker stuffed in his mouth.

4. Eddie gets his head crushed by a leather strap. Cool kill, but all of these deaths seem to have been done before.

3. Tina just had sex, is resting on her picnic blanket when out of nowhere is stabbed in the eyes by garden sheers and loses her eyes.

2. Roy is a crazy paramedic that pretends to be Jason this whole time to get revenge on the fact his son was killed. He doesn’t even kill Victor the only one to blame for his son’s death. Well, he falls out of a barn window and falls on a random set of spikes.

1. Junior is a dumb hillbilly who is riding his motorcycle home after Tommy beats him up. On his way, Junior gets close lined, but instead of Roy’s arm it is a machete and Junior’s head come clean off. Not bad.

Conclusion

                This one is the worst, it is not fun, and it has a lame twist and a sort of confusing ending.   I think Jason comes back after this and boy I sure hope so. I love crazy, overpowered Jason who can transport from over here to over there in a heartbeat.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s